Daily Draw: Death (Reversed)

In a previous post, I mentioned how I had a surprising experience when I found myself really connecting with and adoring the Death card. Still, stigmas attached to it pervade, because as I drew my first card in months and saw Death - especially in the reversed aspect - my heart began to pound in my chest!

Death normally signifies change and transformation; and honestly, I find the card to be beautiful. Even in real life, I tend to view death as a natural and necessary part of existence. It's not something I fear, though of course, it is definitely something I hope I don't encounter soon! In the reversed aspect, the death card generally means you are at a standstill. Things are stagnant, and perhaps you are resisting change. It has been difficult for me to do this reading, especially as there are two other cards which have managed to catch my eye today: the Queen of Cups and the Page of Wands. Both of these together lead me to believe that the cards are trying to inform me about my relationship.

My boyfriend and I are certainly no perfect couple. We were for a while, but then reality set in and we argued over silly things and there were a few very tense moments where we both dealt with the worst parts of each other. Yet, here we are, standing strong, together, and sending cute text messages back and forth. So when the cards seem to indicate that I am resisting change or that I am having relationship issues, what I mostly feel is confusion. As I write this, my boyfriend is reassuring me that he loves me and that things are totally fine.

So I have to wonder; what other changes could I be resisting? Today is my first full day without seeing my boyfriend in nearly two months. I spend the majority of my time at his house, although occasionally, I come home to visit with my mom for a while. As you might imagine, while I love visiting with my family, I always hurt at the thought of being without my love. He is a force of goodness in my life, and has often been the anchor which keeps me on solid ground. Especially while I deal with mental health issues, he is a rock and he supports me the best he can.

So I'm drawn to believe, then, that the cards are reflecting the pain in my heart from being without him. Death in its reversed aspect reflects my difficulty of letting my circumstances change and saying goodbye to him, even if only for a short period. However, both of the court cards give me a positive energy, and I am certain that despite the sadness of being without my love, the pain will ultimately be short-lived and that good vibes and emotional satisfaction are sure to come in the near future!

In lieu of this reading, my goal for tomorrow is to give my boyfriend extra amounts of love and maybe a phone call so I can hear his voice.

- Erebella

What is Tarot?

The short answer: A conversation.

If there is one thing that my brief studies have shown me, its that tarot is, above all else, a movement. The versatility of the card meanings, along with the shifts that occur based on placement; it is nothing but constant flow of meaning and emotion. Consider the death card by itself; it can be foreboding and worrisome, but it can also be relief; a chance for a fresh start. Reincarnation and renewal. The death card is easily one of my favorites so far just because it is so much more than its face value.

Deviant Moon Tarot

And the death card illustrates the point I intend to make very well: tarot is a way of channeling your inner focus and energy on something and opening yourself up to other ideas and approaches. Tarot allows you to recenter and evaluate your life with other lenses. Feeling like you are lacking in productivity may lead you to tarot, and the cards you draw allow you to focus on the archetypes which always surround us and find meanings and maybe even solutions which make sense. So does it not make sense to use your knowledge of the tarot and judge that against the situation you seek to gain insight for?

When giving a reading, does it not make sense to journey with the one receiving the reading to discover through the process of give and take what the cards might mean to him or her?

After all, interpretation is subjective and the meaning of a spread can vary so greatly depending upon the circumstances and character of the person seeking guidance. I believe that tarot is more than just laying out a few cards and saying "this is what you need to do". I believe that tarot reflects what we already know, but just allows us to see it through new eyes. And since we can't know everything about the other party when doing readings for others, we must talk to them. Say "This card can represent lots of changes; is something happening in your life that may facilitate that?"

Would it be possible to come to these sorts of revelations on your own, without tarot to guide you? Absolutely. Is it made easier when you have some sort of context to view yourself which is both outside of the situation while being completely informed by it? Definitely.

So to me, ultimately, tarot is a conversation. Between the reader and the one being read to. Between your internal and your external self. Tarot is a form of visually applying your inner knowledge to a problem and applying it physically.

Do I believe that some divine force or mystical being guides my cards and determines the outcome? I'm not so sure. But I do believe that in putting my faith in my tarot deck, I can look past the fog in my head and find clarity.

The method is complex, but the purpose is beautifully simple.